Have you ever chilled out in the bath with a nice mellow spliff - it’s amazing!

Whether you chill to Moby, Jack Johnson or even Prince, together with your favourite chillout tracks, a spliff in the bath can be like bathing in Fiji! Roll yourself a fat White Widow, or Hawaiin Haze joint (country dependent!) and sit back to your favourite tunes. A bath joint is best served with a cold beer and chilled lighting. If you only have dazzling spotlights in your bathroom try a candle or 2, this also helps clear the air if you are not allowed to smoke in the bathroom, the hot steam also clears the air of any smells just make sure you stay in there for 15 minutes following your smoke!

Personally we recommend sourcing some white widow for your bath chill out, it is a global success due to its impressive growing speed and White Widow also yields an impressive amount of trichomes with a 60%/40% indica/sativa cross-strain giving White Widow one of the highest percentages of TCH known to growers and smokers alike.

With this in mind, get yourself a nice big bud and chill with this in the bath its heaven! A 60/40 high-stoned is perfect for ending your days troubles in a nice full hot bath - Enjoy!!!

There is so much we could say about Tinchy Stryder but we think his music talks for itself…

Tincy Stryder - Stryderman

Tinchy Stryder - Breathe

[Support Tinchy Stryder by buying a 'Star In The Hood' T-Shirt]

The backbone of the Dutch coffee-shop industry, the first of the “white weed” strains and an all-round commercial success story, White Widow is one of the most famous cannabis strains in modern growing. While this is partly due to her memorable name, her speed, yield and stunningly thick coating of trichomes have a lot more to do with it!

Mostly-Indica, with sweet, thick, acrid smoke that imparts a hammering stone, White Widow is a major part of many visitors’ first experience of Amsterdam.

White Widow grown from seed is very easy to clone, and is a good plant with which to perfect your technique.

[click here to get some White Widow from Sensi Seeds]

The information on this page has been supplied by Sensi Seeds.

How to make a Joint (How to roll a Spliff)
Step by step instruction guide for rolling the perfect Joint!

You will need:

• A pack of skins (the professional smokers favourable skins are rizza king silvers)
• Tobacco (the professional smokers favourable cigarettes are Lambert and Butler).
• Enough cannabis to make a spliff (about 0.4g of properly dried and cured cannabis).
• Some sort of roach (a small piece of cardboard).

Step by Step Guide to rolling a spliff:

1. Pull a skin out of the packet and place it on something that is sort of V shaped so the skin sit inside it open with the gum side facing yourself.
2. Make a roach for the spliff.
3. Grind your cannabis so it is in small pieces.
4. Put a thin layer of tobacco in the spliff.
5. Put the roach on the left hand side if your are right handed or on the right hand side if you are left handed.
6. Sprinkle the cannabis over the tobacco so there is an even layer across it and no tobacco can be seen.
7. Sprinkle a thin layer of tobacco over the cannabis.
8. Pick the skin up with your hands.
9. Slowly roll the spliff so that the tobacco and weed mix shapes into the shape you want your spliff.
10. Roll the side of the skin without the gum down so its just holds the tobacco and cannabis mix.
11. Slide your thumb over the lower side along the spliff tucking it under the other side and then roll it up.
12. Roll the spliff up so that the skin is tight around the mix and the gum is just showing.
13. Lick the gum
14. Keep rolling it up so that all of the gum is stuck down

Here are some pictures to help you when making a joint:

(above) This is how the skin should be so the mix can be put in easily.

(above) This is how much Cannabis to put in a Spliff.

(above) This is how the spliff should look before its ready to roll.

(above) The perfect spliff - what a joint should look like after it is rolled and sparked up.

If anybody wants anymore help ot has any consturctive critisism don’t hesitate to leave any comments.

We hope you enjoy our joint rolling guide, if you have any suggestions to improve or know of an easier way to roll a spliff please leave us a comment!

pictures courtesy of Weedguru.com

The ProfessionalSmoker.co.uk team have a broad taste in music ranging from Underground Grime to Commercial Scouse House - yeah you know who you are! So we decided to set up a Music section so we can inflict our musical tastes onto our readers who will hopefully spread the word on some of the Artists we feature.

To kick start we have decided to feature no other than Mr Eskiboy himself…

Wiley aka Eskiboy is one of the UK’s hottest Producers, responsible for a string of underground smash hits and has more recently received mainstream applause for his massive UK hit ‘Wearing My Rolex’. Wiley, real name Richard Kylea Cowi is a major player is the UK Grime scene and a founding member of the Roll Deep Crew.

Wiley is based in East London and is responsible for shining the limelight on artists such as J.M.E and Skepta.

Half Baked is an epic stoner film that focus’s around a Janitor and his stoner friends. Basically, one of the guys he lives with gets arrested for feeding a Diabetic Police Horse with loads of sweets and it dies! He is put into prison and his Bail is set at $1,000,000 and if he wants to make bail his friends have to raise 100 grand to get him out.

The trio of friends hatch a plan to use the Janitors [Dave Chappelle] connections at the Building he works at to get some Medical Marijuana to sell around New York City. Obviously they get into a whole host of trouble and have to use the power of the Green to get them through as the story takes and interesting twist with a love story between the Janitor and Mary Jane.

This is an EXCELLENT stoner film that can be watched by most ages without causing offence!

Some of our favourite quotes from Half Baked;

Scarface: Fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, you’re cool, and fuck you, I’m out!

Brian: Get some sour cream and onion chips with some dip, man, some beef jerky, some peanut butter. Get some Häagen-Dazs ice cream bars, a whole lot, make sure chocolate, gotta have chocolate, man. Some popcorn, red popcorn, graham crackers, graham crackers with marshmallows, the little marshmallows and little chocolate bars and we can make s’mores, man. Also, celery, grape jelly, Cap’n Crunch with the little Crunch berries, pizzas. We need two big pizzas, man, everything on ‘em, with water, whole lotta water, and Funyons.
Kenny: That’s it?
Thurgood Jenkins: Yeah, get me a box of condoms, and, what was that thing we used to eat back in the day? What was it… oh yeah, pussy.
Kenny: You got it.

Brian: First of all to understand what happened to killer, you gotta understand who killer the dog was. Now killer was born to a three-legged bitch of a mother. He was always ashamed of this, man. And then right after that he’s adopted by this man, Tito Liebowitz he’s a small time gun runner and a rotweiler fight promoter. So he puts killer into training. They see killer’s good. He is damn good. But then he had the fight of his life. They pit him against his brother nibbles. And killer said “no man that’s my brother, I can’t fight nibbles” but they made him fight anyway, and killer, he killed nibbles. Killer said “that’s it!” he called off all his fights, and he started doing crack, and he freaked out. Then in a rage, he collapsed, and his heart no longer beat. wow.
Thurgood Jenkins: You know uh, I never thought I’d say this to anybody, but you two smoke entirely too much reefer.

Brian: For 400 dollars I got Jerry Garcia in a pouch, man!
Thurgood Jenkins: Who the fuck told you that?
Brian: The man who sold it to me, Barry Garcia.
Thurgood Jenkins: So who is that, Jerry Garcia’s brother?
Brian: No, actually it was Andy Garcia’s brother.

Thurgood Jenkins: I don’t do drugs, though. Just weed.

Read the Daily Toke Half Baked Movie Review…

How High, starring legendary Method Man (Silas P. Silas) and Redman (Jamal King), is one of the funniest films you will ever watch. The plotline goes something like this; Drug enthusiast and chemical master Silas and his friend Jamal lose their best friend Ivory to a disturbing pot related dread-lock fire, growing a pot plant in his ashes they use his heavenly connections to hook them up with all the knowledge they need to make it to Harvard… where they change the lives of the up-tight ivy league in the way only good stoner’s can.

Some of our favourite quotes from the How High;

Silas: Peace.
Bart: Peace is meant to explain a state of tranquility. Ok? So why don’t you try finding a way to say goodbye, now that you’re among civilized people.
Silas: Well, Mr. Civilized, peace can also be used interjectionally, as a request, greeting or farewell. So, try to find another way to be an asshole, if you don’t know your, grammar, that is. Peace.

Tuan: Hey, I am down with you! You east coast, I FAR east coast!

Baby Powder: Now here I’ve got a twenty dollar money order…
Hella Back: Twenty Dollars!
End Table Ass: Money Order!
Baby Powder: …that you two bitches can split!

Field of Dreams Guy: Damn, I’m hungrier than four dudes!
PCC Agent: And I’m hungrier than five!
Field of Dreams Guy: Well who are you, jack, and what you doin’ in my house?
PCC Agent: I’m the spokesperson for Pork-Chops-O-Chunky. Whether you’re black or a honkey, you’ll love Pork-Chops-O-Chunky!
Field of Dreams Guy: Damn, that’s Funky!

[after Harvard is described to them by Huntley]
Silas:Shit, I’ll fucks witcha!
Jamal: Shit, I’ll fucks witcha, too!
Huntley: And that’s a good thing?
Jamal: Yes. That’s a “yes”!
Huntley: Then we’ll ‘fucks’ with each other.

Dean Cain: What on earth are you wearing?
Tuan: BUFU.
Dean Cain: BUFU?
Tuan: By us. Fuck you!

more quotes can be found on IMDB…

How High Cast - Pointless General Knowledge

Method Man … Silas P. Silas
Redman … Jamal King
Obba Babatundé … Dean Carl Cain
Mike Epps … Baby Powder
Anna Maria Horsford … Mamma King
Fred Willard … Philip Huntley
Jeffrey Jones … Vice President
Hector Elizondo … Bill the Crew Coach
Lark Voorhies … Lauren
Al Shearer … I Need Money
Chuck Deezy … Ivory - Ghost (as Chuck Davis)
Essence Atkins … Jamie
Chris Elwood … Bart
T.J. Thyne … Gerald
Justin Urich … Jeffrey
Trieu Tran … Tuan
Dennison Samaroo … Amir
Tracey Walter … Prof. Wood
Spalding Gray … Prof. Jackson
Amber Smith … Prof. Garr
Kathy Wagner … Intellect
Alicia Leigh Willis … Intellect (as Alicia Willis)
Patrice Fisher … End Table Ass
Sacha Kemp … Hella Back
Anthony McKinley … Baby Wipe (as Scruncho)
Garrett Morris … PCC Agent
Scott Lincoln … Crackhead
Alem Brhan Sapp … Jamaican (as Alem Brhan)
Erica Vittina Phillips … Internet Date
Irene Roseen … THC Woman
Dwayne Kennedy … Israelite
Jimi Antoine … Israelite (as Jimmy Judah)
Pat Finn … Army Recruiter
Michael Coleman … Priest
James Reese … Agent
Rob Nagle … Agent
Judah Friedlander … Student
Joe Ochman … Ben Franklin
Leontine Guilliard … Mamma’s Friend
Roz Browne … Mamma’s Friend
Louis Freese … Cypress Hill (as B-Real)
Senen Reyes … Cypress Hill (as Sen Dog)
Bobo … Cypress Hill
Chuck Liddell … Tough Guy
Alfonso Alcarez … Tough Guy
Dublin James … Sidekick
Melissa Peterman … Mrs. Sheila Cain
David Stebbins … V.P. Aide
Anthony DeSantis … Satanist

How many of you out there have a ‘Wake and Bake‘? I’ll be honest with you, I never used to smoke that much during the day but things have been getting really stressful in the office so lately i have taken to starting the day with a Wake and Bake.

The Urban Dictionary’s top 5 definition’s of Wake and Bake:

Toking up right after you wake up.
“Morning Drew, I got 10 dollars, feel like a wake n’ bake?”

The best technique and true defintion is waking up and (in bed) immediately smoking the ‘pre-packed’ bong that is sitting ‘ready to smoke’ on your bedside table.
Can be used to describe any situation where someone smokes weed upto 1 hour after waking up.
“I becomin’ a bit chronic at the moment, like ‘wake and bake’ everyday and shit, ‘nahmeanyaheardit!”

The act of smoking pot early in the morning, usually right after waking-up.
- “Seriously, you’re getting high at 9:23 on a Wednesday morning?”
- “It’s wake and bake, and I helped.”

It’s become habit now to have a pre rolled cone waiting for me as soon as I get out of bed, it sorts of takes the pain out of the mornings for me - I know it probably sounds mad but I am now getting alot more done in the morning now that I do blaze up pre work as a pose to when I was going into the office straight headed! So what do all our readers think about a Wake and Bake - is it the way forward?

Ever rolled a joint before going out and kept it in your pocket for the return journey?

Can you feel the anger and frustration take over your senses when you reach for the joint a few hours later, only to find that it’s now shrunk to about a centimetre long and your pocket is covered with tobacco?
As you defiantly cast the useless joint into the wet road… spare a thought for your good friends at EveryoneDoesIT.com, who sell protective joint holders for only 35p.

Every member of staff at ProfessionalSmoker.co.uk has a joint holder from EDIT and highly reccomend that you get one, you cant’t really argue for 35p, hell if your not happy with your joint holder drop us an email and we will send you 35p in the post!

[Click Here to get a Joint Holder from EDIT]

You know the sort of person I mean, he’s always the one sat in the back of the car trying to completely blag your head while your sitting off just trying to get high, he’s the guy pissing you right off with his random ramblings…

Anyway, I was sat in the car a couple of weeks ago with three of my mates from college, having a couple of doobs, you know how it is! There’s this guy I don’t really know sat in the back of my car, mate of a mate sort of thing, anyway to be fair he was sorta pissing me off, just chatting absolute randomness, but it wasn’t even funny, just god dam annoying.

Anyway I decided to turn the tables on mr random and give him a conundrum to pickle his head, he started going on about how he knew someone who was originally from Bolivia, moved to Peru for a year when they where 12 and then moved over to the UK - “ok” I thought, a bit random to say the least, so i popped out with “My best friend is from Mexico but he has Irish / Spanish roots, the last family get together I went to of his was mad, there were stuck up spanish divas, irish brawlers and mexican bandits” - needless to say he shut up after that.

Submitted by: lisaaaaa

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